My Liquid Magic Robot Friend

You know what’s better than making coffee in the A-M? Someone else making coffee in the A-M. I thought it couldn’t get better than listening to my husband bang around the cupboards on my behalf. But it does get better.

If you were older than 10 in 1998, you may remember the infomercial for Showtime Rotisserie. “Set it…and forget it!” As a lifetime worry wart, that concept’s not for me. SO. MUCH. CAN. GO. WRONG. So I don’t mess with auto-shut-off hair tools, creepy self-driving vacuums or slow cookers (unless I’m vegging it on the couch for 10-12 hours on low). But I recently ran into “Delay Brew”. She’s a funky robot feature on my two-year-old coffee maker that changed things forever.

Like high school, I passed her every day in the hall en route to the bathroom but cowered at the thought of actually interacting. Then, one Wednesday, BAM. With a new, functioning fridge scheduled to be delivered, I was working from home the next day and Husband was out of town. I needed a brew plan.

But do I risk the hazards of setting it and forgetting it? Immediately I remembered the very serious advice I shared in a 2011 letter to undergrads at my alma mater: “Say ‘yes.’ Exceed the expectations set for you whenever possible and do it with a smile.” So, I flubbed my way around the coffee maker, set Delay Brew and my alarm for 7 a.m., and hoped for the best.

The next morning, I slept through my cash register ringtone. I peeled out of bed at 7:30 and booked it to the kitchen. The apartment was still standing and along with it, liquid magic. At first, I felt guilty for showing up 30 minutes late to the party. Then, JOY. I mean what a treat. A room-service rival.

Am I sold on “set it and forget it”? Nope. But forever and for always (Shania Twain quote), I’ll befriend Delay Brew (likely only when Husband is away), so I can awake to a hot pot and pretend someone else did it.

Cheers.

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